It turns out that many young adult members of the boston jewish community are thinking quite seriously about this question. see below for some of their responses, ranging from “no jews” to “only jews.”
It is true that Reform Judaism would accept children raised as Jews as sufficient to view your children as Jewish. Is he serious?
Let me be totally frank with you. I think it is much too early to consider converting.
Being an atheist would prevent you from having an Orthodox conversion anyway. Does your partner believe in God? How does he view your beliefs? Has he introduced you to his family or taken you to services at his synagogue?
You ask if your children could convert to Orthodox Jewry. I am completely committed to the idea of raising children in a kosher household and abiding by the halachah.
But the issue that has really been bothering me is the thought of future children. I know that if I wanted our children to be accepted as Orthodox Jews, then the obvious solution is to convert. I understand this would be enough for Reform Judaism to consider our children to be Jewish, but not Orthodoxy.
Granted, he may at this point be lying to himself most of all, but you are the person who will be most harmed. Enter. This is always the toughest part.
Is your partner open to talking to me? You have raised a of issues.
The debrief: will you only date jews?
I know that my partner wants to share his Jewish identity with his kids, and I am fully onboard. News News Bay Area U. Please ask him about this and tell me what he says. First, a good place to start learning about Judaism would be a basic Judaism class. I do not support lying or deception in a relationship.
Subscribe to our Newsletter. Send letters to dawn buildingjewishbridges. If you are sleeping together, that should be a red flag. You would learn in a structured way and have a teacher as a resource.
Interfaith marriage in judaism
Are you planning to pretend to believe in order to have a traditional home? Is your partner ready to face that? Dear Planning: Thank you for your kind words. I am a non-Jew in a relationship with a Jewish man.
But that would be artificial on your part.
I have been researching as much as I can, but I notice that it is quite difficult to find information on Judaism for non-Jews. He owes you an explanation as to why he is dating you. Has he thought about the complications? There are occasions when can have an Orthodox conversion when the mother is not Jewish: if the child is raised in an observant home, going to an Orthodox day school, etc. I am aware that if we were to marry, our marriage would not be recognized by Orthodox Judaism.
A rabbi who counsels millennials urges: keep the door open.
Indeed, you could change everything by having an Orthodox conversion. Does he see this relationship as serious? Dear Dawn: Can I first say how impactful and helpful I have found your writing? I love him, and his Orthodox identity is a big part of who he is.
Yes, the big can of worms is children.